Here in America, where Christianity is the majority
religion, we all know of an individual or two who best exemplifies a truly
Christian lifestyle. For me, one such
person is Laura Jane Ketcham.
Jane, as she is commonly known, was never one to
wear her faith on her sleeve. She was
not an evangelist. Nor did she come across as “holier than thou.” Jane’s Christianity served as a foundation for her values and a source of hope. It gave her an inner strength and an outer
glow. It impelled her to help others. In fact, it inspired what would become her
favorite quotation: “Always be a little
kinder than necessary.” Jane posted
that saying in her kitchen. She tried to
live that ethic throughout her life, but she failed. She was a lot kinder than necessary.
As a prototypical Christian, Jane lived meekly and
modestly. She did so not in order to inherit
the Earth but because she truly was humble.
She never wanted a fuss made about her.
She never thought she was worthy of anyone’s attention. Still, she must have realized that she was
loved and respected by everyone who knew her.
No sane person could have viewed
her any other way.
Jefferson had his ideal of the yeoman farmer. For me, Jane became the ideal of the yeoman
wife. Having graduated from high school
at 16 and having been elected into Phi Beta Kappa a few years later in college,
Jane had a number of vocational choices available to her. What
she chose to do, for nearly 30 years, was to serve as the secretary to her
husband, a small-town lawyer. Jane
typed her husband’s briefs, raised his children, and took care of his office
and his house. Hers was the smiling face
that his clients saw as they walked into the law office, which was across the
street from the county courthouse. Jane lived and worked in a town of roughly
1,200 people that was surrounded by corn fields and not much else. Everyone in the town knew her.
Jane was a joiner.
She was active not only in her Methodist church but in other local societies
as well. When Alexis de Tocqueville cited
voluntary associations as America’s characteristic institutions, he surely was
thinking about people like Jane. Jane
became part of her town’s backbone.
Whenever it needed someone to help, it could always count on Laura Jane
Ketcham.
Jane had plenty of friends, and yet she was also one
to enjoy her solitude. She was an avid
reader, crafter, quilter, Crossword Puzzle solver, and Scrabble player.
She had a Scotch-Irish background and, indeed, some of her favorite authors
were British. Yet sadly, she never got
to visit Great Britain – or any other part of the world outside of North
America. Jane wasn’t especially affluent,
but more to the point, she wasn’t especially covetous of what she had been missing
in life. Jane was always content in her
lot. Like I said, she was a true
Christian.
As a college student, it had been Jane’s dream to
become a librarian. While she never
realized that dream, she did live long enough to see her daughter, the valedictorian
of her high school class and a successful lawyer who was trained at Harvard, give up a career in law to become a school librarian. Jane lived long enough to see a lot of things
happen. She had three children, nine
grandchildren and nine great-grandchildren.
Not a one could have mustered a single unkind thing to say about
her.
Jane was married only once, and the marriage lasted
from 1942 until her husband’s death in 1990.
Roughly a decade later, she moved 150 miles southwest from her hometown
of Albion to an independent living facility near Indianapolis, her state’s
capital. There, she could live near one
of her children and several of her grandchildren and great-grandchildren. Jane remained healthy throughout her 80s,
but her health gradually began to falter once she hit the age of 90. Eventually, she needed to move into a nursing
home, her eyes no longer permitted her to read, and the great energy level that
had once sustained her (and her home town) was no longer available.
This past Wednesday, Jane was admitted to a hospital. I spoke to her daughter about the hospitalization
late in the evening. She told me, for
the first time, that in her view, Jane would not want to keep on living. Jane’s daughter added that her mother had
such a strong heart that she may well continue to survive, despite her growing
list of health problems.
Thursday morning at 1:30, I received a phone
call. It was my brother-in-law. Half asleep, I gave the phone to my
wife. She was informed that her beloved mother,
Laura Jane Ketcham, had passed away at the age of 93. On the one hand, my wife was devastated about
the loss of her hero, the family matriarch, the truest of Christians. On the other hand, she was relieved that her
mother would not have to endure a life of intolerable suffering. Her heart never did quit on her, but her
liver and kidneys did.
Jane passed away with a loving granddaughter holding
one of her hands and a loving grandson holding the other. She died at just the right time, having
squeezed as much out of this life as possible, but not so much that she would
overstay her welcome. It was never Jane’s
way to overstay her welcome. She was
here to help in whatever way was needed and never to ask anything in
return.
I owe Laura Jane Ketcham my happiness. My children owe her their lives.
I hope for your sake that you have one or more Laura
Jane Ketchams in your life. If not, head
out to the middle of America, look for corn or wheat fields, and stay a
while. You might not find a great
tourist attraction. But then again, to borrow
words from the great Ludwig Feuerbach, you just might find the essence of
Christianity.
2 comments:
Well said, Dan. I remember her kindness and I was just the know-it-all teenaged son of one's her daughter's friends. I would add that she would be exemplar of a Hoosier too.
Well said, Dan. I remember her kindness and I was a know-it-all teenaged son to her daughter's friend. I would add that she was exemplar of the term "Hoosier hospitality."
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